8 Powerful Exercises to Cultivate the 'C's of Self Energy' in Your IFS Practice

Do you ever feel torn between conflicting thoughts, emotions, or desires?

Perhaps a part of you wants to pursue a new opportunity, while another part is held back by fear or self-doubt. Or maybe you find yourself overeating, procrastinating, or engaging in other unwanted behaviors, even when a part of you knows better.

If you can relate to this inner tug-of-war, you're not alone. We all have different parts of ourselves that can feel at odds with each other at times. The good news is that Internal Family Systems (IFS), a powerfully transformative therapeutic model, offers a pathway to inner harmony by helping us connect with our "Self Energy"—a core essence within each of us that is characterized by qualities like calmness, curiosity, compassion, clarity, courage, creativity, connectedness, and confidence.

Thanks to our brain's remarkable ability to change and rewire itself (known as neuroplasticity), we can actually train ourselves to more readily access this Self energy through consistent practice. Just as physical exercise strengthens our muscles, regularly engaging in IFS-based exercises can strengthen the neural pathways associated with these beneficial qualities, making it easier for us to embody them in our daily lives.

In this article, we'll explore eight powerful exercises designed to help you cultivate the "8 C's" of Self energy. Whether you're brand new to IFS or have been practicing for a while, these exercises can help you develop a deeper connection to your authentic Self and promote greater inner well-being.

Best of all, they only take 5-10 minutes a day - a small investment of time that can lead to profound shifts over time.

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Understanding the IFS Model

IFS, developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz in the 1980s, is based on the idea that our psyche is not a singular entity but is composed of multiple parts, each with its own emotions, beliefs, and motivations.

The Basic Premise of IFS

IFS proposes that our psyche is not a single, unified entity, but rather a system of distinct parts, each with its own perspectives, feelings, and goals. This might sound strange at first, but consider how we often talk about ourselves:

• "A part of me wants to take that job, but another part is scared."

• "I'm trying to eat healthily, but a part of me just wants to binge on junk food."

• "I know I should forgive them, but something in me just can't let it go."

These common expressions reflect the multiplicity that IFS recognizes as fundamental to our inner world.

Types of Parts in IFS

In the IFS model, our parts generally fall into three categories:

1. Exiles: Vulnerable parts that often carry pain, trauma, or feelings of inadequacy. They are often hidden away but can drive intense emotional reactions when triggered.

2. Managers: Parts that attempt to keep the system safe by controlling or suppressing emotional vulnerability. They may manifest as perfectionism, over-planning, or anxiety.

3. Firefighters: Parts that jump into action when emotional pain breaks through, using distractions or numbing behaviors like overeating, substance use, or overworking to put out the "fire."

At the core of IFS is the belief that Self—a state characterized by qualities like calmness, clarity, and compassion—can lead our internal system toward healing. The goal of IFS is to access Self and allow it to take the leadership role in our inner world, guiding our parts with understanding and care.

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The 8 C’s of Self Energy

In IFS, Self Energy is often described by eight key qualities, known as the "8 C’s." These are:

1. Calmness: A deep sense of inner peace and stability.

2. Curiosity: A genuine interest in understanding your parts and experiences without judgment.

3. Compassion: The ability to approach yourself and others with kindness and care.

4. Clarity: The capacity to see situations and inner conflicts clearly, without distortion.

5. Courage: The strength to face difficult feelings and situations, both internally and externally.

6. Creativity: The ability to think outside the box and approach life’s challenges with new ideas and flexibility.

7. Connectedness: A sense of deep connection to others, your environment, and your own inner world.

8. Confidence: A trust in your ability to navigate life and its challenges from a place of Self Energy.

By cultivating these qualities, we allow Self to emerge as the leader of our internal system, fostering harmony and well-being. Below are eight exercises designed to help you tap into these qualities in your daily life.

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Exercise 1: Calm Center Visualization

Purpose: Develop a sense of inner calm to access Self even in stressful moments.

Detailed Steps:

1. Find a Quiet Space: Sit or lie down comfortably in a place where you won’t be disturbed.

2. Close Your Eyes and Breathe: Take slow, deep breaths. Inhale for a count of 4, hold for 2, and exhale for 6. Repeat until you feel your body relax.

3. Visualize Your Calm Place: Picture a scene that represents peace and tranquility for you—perhaps a serene beach, a mountain top, or a cozy room.

4. Engage Your Senses: Imagine the sounds, smells, and sensations of this place. Feel the warmth of the sun, the scent of pine trees, or the gentle rustling of leaves.

5. Create Your Calm Center: Visualize a specific spot in this peaceful environment where you feel completely at ease—this is your calm center.

6. Set Your Anchor: While in this calm space, touch your thumb and forefinger together. This physical movement will serve as an anchor to recall this sense of calmness later.

Integration: Use your anchor (thumb and forefinger touch) throughout your day to access your calm center, especially during moments of stress.

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Exercise 2: Curiosity Journal

Purpose: Cultivate curiosity toward your inner world to understand your parts without judgment.

Detailed Steps:

1. Identify a Part: Think about a part of yourself that often feels triggered—perhaps a part that gets anxious or self-critical.

2. Set a Timer: Give yourself 10 minutes for this exercise.

3. Write Freely: In a journal, write down everything this part wants to say. Ask questions like, “What do you fear?” or “What do you want me to understand?”

4. Avoid Judging: As you write, remain curious and avoid trying to change or correct the part. Your goal is to understand it better.

Integration: Revisit your journal regularly. Notice if new insights or shifts in perspective arise as you deepen your curiosity toward your parts.

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Exercise 3: Compassionate Self-Talk

Purpose: Develop self-compassion, especially during times of self-criticism.

Detailed Steps:

1. Recall a Difficult Moment: Think about a recent time when you were hard on yourself.

2. Imagine a Friend: How would you respond to a friend in the same situation? What words of support or kindness would you offer them?

3. Speak to Yourself Aloud: Using the same compassionate language, speak to yourself as you would to that friend. If it's uncomfortable, start with phrases like, "I know this is hard," or "I'm here for you."

4. Write It Down: Record these compassionate phrases and refer back to them whenever self-criticism arises.

Integration: Practice this whenever you catch yourself in self-critical thought patterns. Over time, it will become more natural to respond with compassion.

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Exercise 4: Clarity Meditation

Purpose: Enhance clarity when faced with inner or outer conflict.

Detailed Steps:

1. Choose a Focus: Identify a situation or part that feels confusing or overwhelming.

2. Find Stillness: Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and take several deep breaths.

3. Observe the Situation: Picture the situation in your mind as if you’re watching it on a screen. Allow it to unfold without judgment.

4. Ask for Clarity: Gently ask yourself, “What am I not seeing?” or “What is the most important aspect here?”

5. Be Open to Insights: Allow thoughts, images, or feelings to surface without trying to control them.

Integration: Use this meditation whenever you feel stuck. The more you practice, the more you’ll be able to access clarity in everyday situations.

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Exercise 5: Courage Breathing

Purpose: Build courage to face uncomfortable emotions or situations.

Detailed Steps:

1. Identify a Fear or Challenge: Think of a part of your life that you’ve been avoiding.

2. Breathe Deeply: Inhale deeply, imagining that you’re drawing courage into your body. Hold for a moment, then exhale, releasing any fear or tension.

3. Visualize Taking a Step: As you breathe, imagine yourself taking one small step toward facing this fear or challenge.

4. Repeat with Each Breath: With each inhale, draw in more courage; with each exhale, let go of fear.

Integration: Use this breathing exercise before engaging in difficult conversations, tasks, or when you feel overwhelmed.

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Exercise 6: Creative Problem Solving

Purpose: Tap into your creative energy to generate solutions for internal or external challenges.

Detailed Steps:

1. Identify an Area of Stuckness: Choose a challenge you're currently facing.

2. Set a Timer for 15 Minutes: Write down as many solutions as possible, even if they seem unrealistic or silly.

3. Engage Your Imagination: Picture yourself from different perspectives, or ask, “How would a child solve this problem?” or “What if there were no limitations?”

4. Review and Reflect: After brainstorming, identify one or two ideas that feel most promising.

Integration: Incorporate this creative problem-solving approach whenever you face obstacles, whether big or small.

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Exercise 7: Connectedness Reflection

Purpose: Deepen your sense of connection with yourself, others, and the world around you.

Detailed Steps:

1. Reflect on a Positive Connection: Think of a recent experience where you felt deeply connected to someone or something.

2. Describe It: In your journal, describe how this connection made you feel. Which qualities of Self (compassion, calmness, creativity) did it bring out in you?

3. Plan to Strengthen It: Identify one action you can take to nurture or deepen this connection, such as reaching out to the person, spending more time in nature, or engaging in community work.

Integration: Make this reflection a regular practice to strengthen your sense of connectedness.

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Exercise 8: Confidence Affirmations

Purpose: Build confidence in your ability to lead from Self.

Detailed Steps:

1. Identify Areas of Insecurity: Think about situations where you often doubt yourself.

2. Create Affirmations: Write down affirmations that counter these doubts, such as “I am capable of handling challenges,” or “I trust my inner wisdom.”

3. Speak Them Out Loud: Stand in front of a mirror and say these affirmations with conviction, or write them down repeatedly.

4. Visualize Success: As you repeat these affirmations, visualize yourself handling challenging situations with confidence and grace.

Integration: Use these affirmations daily, particularly before engaging in situations where you feel uncertain.

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Embracing the 8 C's of Self Energy

By incorporating these eight exercises into your IFS practice, you can actively cultivate the qualities of Self Energy, allowing calmness, curiosity, compassion, and the other C’s to guide your inner system.

The more you nurture these qualities, the more you’ll experience greater emotional balance, resilience, and a deeper sense of harmony in your life. Keep exploring these exercises and watching for the subtle, yet powerful, shifts that occur as Self takes its rightful place as the leader of your internal world.