Two Words That Connect You to Self
"I'm listening..."
These two simple words can have a profound impact when used intentionally. By saying "I'm listening" to yourself, you open a direct line of communication with your subconscious mind, the part of you that operates beneath the surface, managing countless processes without your conscious awareness.
We all have an inner world filled with automatic thoughts, emotions, and beliefs that shape our actions and decisions. Most of this activity happens in the background, guided by the subconscious mind. It keeps our body functioning—like making our heart beat and our lungs breathe—and influences our behaviors and emotions in ways we may not fully understand.
By consciously saying "I'm listening," you signal to your subconscious that you're ready to hear what it has to share. This simple phrase opens a space for insights, intuition, and memories to rise into your awareness, allowing you to connect with parts of yourself that are often overlooked in the busyness of life.
Saying "I'm listening" also shifts your mindset toward curiosity and non-judgment. Instead of trying to control or filter your thoughts, you simply observe them, creating a safe space for your deeper self to reveal its wisdom. Over time, this practice can help you tap into and reprogram your mind, leading to greater self-awareness and growth.
Why Develop This Relationship?
Developing a relationship with your subconscious mind is essential because it unlocks a wealth of benefits that can directly influence your well-being, decision-making, and personal growth.
Self-Awareness: One of the most important benefits is gaining greater insight into yourself. Much of what drives our emotions and behaviors is shaped by subconscious patterns. When you regularly listen to your inner workings, you begin to understand your motivations, fears, and desires on a deeper level. This allows you to make more thoughtful decisions and respond to situations mindfully, rather than reacting out of habit.
Emotional Healing: Unresolved emotions and past traumas often reside in the subconscious, quietly influencing our mood and actions. By allowing these feelings to surface, you give yourself the opportunity to heal and release them. This can lead to emotional clarity, inner peace, and a sense of freedom as you work through old wounds.
Creativity and Problem-Solving: Your subconscious is a rich source of creativity and innovative solutions. It stores ideas, experiences, and associations that your conscious mind may not readily access. By tapping into this deeper part of yourself, you can discover new ways to approach problems and unlock creative ideas that were previously hidden from your awareness.
Alignment with Authentic Self: Listening to your subconscious helps you get in touch with your true desires and values. It allows you to identify patterns that resonate with your authentic self, helping you make decisions and set goals that are in line with who you really are, rather than being driven by external expectations or outdated beliefs.
Reprogramming the Mind: Neuroscience shows that focusing conscious attention on subconscious processes can create lasting change in behavior and thought patterns. Repeatedly practicing "I'm listening" allows you to replace negative or limiting beliefs with more positive, empowering ones. Over time, this rewires your brain and reinforces healthier mental habits, leading to a more fulfilling and intentional life.
By regularly using "I'm listening" as a practice, you open the door to personal growth, emotional healing, and a deeper connection with your true self. This ongoing relationship with your subconscious mind brings more clarity, balance, and authenticity into your everyday life.
Self-Listening Exercise (5 Mins):
This exercise helps you connect with your body and mind by scanning from head to toe and listening to the sensations in each area. By focusing your attention and saying “I’m listening,” you can develop a deeper awareness of your physical and emotional state.
Find a Quiet Space: Sit or lie down comfortably. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Let your body relax as you settle into the moment.
Begin the Body Scan: Start at the crown of your head. Notice any sensations or tension and say, “I’m listening…” as you move your awareness down your body.
Forehead and Eyes: Observe any tightness in your forehead. Let your eyes soften and relax.
Cheeks and Jaw: Notice if your jaw feels clenched. Gently release any tension and allow your cheeks to relax.
Neck and Shoulders: Focus on your neck and shoulders, often where tension builds up. Breathe into these areas, releasing heaviness as you exhale.
Arms and Hands: Bring awareness to your upper arms, forearms, and hands. Let them relax, allowing any tension to fade away.
Chest and Back: Notice how your chest rises and falls with each breath. Feel your upper and lower back, softening any tightness you might sense.
Stomach and Hips: Focus on your stomach and hips. Allow your belly to expand with each breath, releasing any knots or tension.
Legs and Feet: Move down to your thighs, knees, calves, and feet. Let them feel heavy and relaxed, noticing any sensations or tightness and allowing it to release.
Completion: Take a few more deep breaths, feeling the relaxation spread throughout your body. When ready, open your eyes slowly and return your attention to the room around you, noticing how you feel.
This simple exercise builds a deeper connection with yourself, fostering self-compassion and awareness in just a few minutes.
What to Expect When You Start Listening to Yourself
When you first try this practice, it’s completely normal for your mind to be all over the place. You might question the value of what you’re doing or feel restless and distracted.
These thoughts can make the practice feel challenging or even pointless at first. However, recognizing these reactions is part of the process. By allowing these initial thoughts to surface without judgment, you’re taking the first steps toward deeper self-awareness.
Below are some of the common thoughts and feelings that may arise when you’re new to this practice—and why it’s okay to experience them.
"This is dumb"
It's natural to feel skeptical or awkward when trying something new, especially if it feels unfamiliar. Many people start with doubts, wondering if it's actually going to work or help. This is completely normal."I have other things to do"
Your mind might wander to tasks on your to-do list or other responsibilities. We’re used to being constantly busy, so sitting quietly can feel like you're wasting time. It’s okay if your mind goes there—just gently bring yourself back to the practice."Nothing is happening"
At first, it might seem like there’s no immediate insight or noticeable change, leading to impatience or frustration. It can feel unproductive if you're not used to sitting with your thoughts."I can’t stop thinking about random things"
Your mind may flood with random thoughts—errands, emails, past conversations. This is common when people first try to focus inward. The goal isn’t to stop these thoughts but to observe them without getting too attached."Am I doing this right?"
Doubts about whether you're "doing it right" can pop up. You may question if you’re supposed to feel something specific or if there's a proper way to practice. Remember, there’s no single right way to listen to yourself."I feel restless or bored"
If you're new to quiet introspection, sitting still can feel uncomfortable or boring. You might feel the urge to check your phone or get up. This restlessness is a common challenge in the beginning."What am I supposed to hear?"
The expectation of a profound revelation can lead to confusion when nothing major surfaces. Early on, the practice might feel anticlimactic because you're not used to recognizing subtle shifts in your thoughts."I’m too anxious to sit here"
For those with anxiety, the quiet can amplify worries, making it feel overwhelming. Be gentle with yourself and don’t force it—every attempt counts. Even short moments of practice add up over time, so start small and be kind to yourself.
These thoughts are all part of the learning process. With patience and practice, the awkwardness or discomfort usually eases, and you can start to gain more from the experience.
Starting a Self-Listening Practice: FAQ
When you begin the practice of listening to your inner thoughts, it’s normal to have questions or doubts.
Whether you're feeling uncertain about how to start or wondering what to expect, you're not alone. Below are answers to some of the most common concerns people have when they first try this practice, offering clarity and reassurance as you take these early steps.
Q: What if I'm afraid to listen because I might not like what I find?
A: It's natural to feel this way. Start slowly and remind yourself that the goal is to understand, not judge. Take breaks if things feel overwhelming.
Q: I tried saying "I'm listening" but nothing happened. Am I doing it wrong?
A: It’s normal for nothing to happen at first. This takes time and patience. Keep practicing and try different settings or times of day.
Q: How do I know if what I'm hearing is my subconscious or just random thoughts?
A: Subconscious insights often feel surprising or intuitive, while regular thoughts are more familiar. Over time, you'll start to sense the difference.
Q: Can this practice replace therapy or medical treatment?
A: No, this is a helpful tool but not a replacement for professional help. If you have mental health concerns, always consult with a healthcare provider.
Q: What if I hear something negative or self-critical?
A: Acknowledge it without judgment. Often, even negative thoughts are trying to protect you in some way. Approach them with curiosity.
Q: How often should I practice this?
A: Start with just a few minutes a day. Consistency is more important than doing it for long periods of time.
Q: Can this help with anxiety or procrastination?
A: Yes, it can help you understand the deeper reasons behind these behaviors, potentially leading to solutions.
Q: What if I feel overwhelmed by emotions?
A: It's okay to take breaks if emotions get too strong. Start slowly and gradually increase your comfort level. If it’s consistently overwhelming, consider seeking professional support.
Q: Is this practice suitable for everyone?
A: Most people can benefit, but if you have a history of trauma or serious mental health concerns, check with a healthcare provider before engaging in deep self-reflection.
Q: How does this practice compare to meditation?
A: Self-listening can actually be seen as a form of meditation or contemplation. For some, especially those with spiritual or religious practices, it might even feel like a form of prayer.
It’s about quieting your mind and being open to what your deeper self, or in some cases your spiritual beliefs, may be trying to communicate. Whether for personal insight or spiritual guidance, the key is being receptive and present.
When it comes to seeking connection with yourself, the message remains clear:
When you ask, you receive; when you seek, you find; and when you knock, doors will open. This wisdom speaks to the universal truth that when you show up with curiosity and intention, growth and understanding follow. The answers and insights you're looking for will come as you continue to explore and connect with your inner self.