Exercise: Interviewing Your Protector Parts

Do you ever feel like part of you is trying to protect you by controlling your behavior or emotions? For example, maybe you have a part that:

• Makes you avoid social situations to prevent potential rejection

• Frequently criticizes you to motivate you to work harder

• Uses food, alcohol, or other substances to numb difficult feelings

• Keeps you constantly busy so you don't have time to feel

In the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model, a cutting-edge approach to therapy developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, these are called "protector parts." They work hard to safeguard you from pain, even if their efforts are sometimes misguided or problematic.

The good news is, by compassionately engaging with protectors, you can understand their positive intentions and help them transform. One powerful way to get to know a protector is to "interview" it. Picture sitting down with that part of you, asking it questions, and really listening to its perspective.

This article will walk you through how to do this in a step-by-step way. No prior experience with IFS is required. The key is to approach your protectors with genuine curiosity and compassion rather than judgment. Every part, even ones that seem destructive, ultimately wants to help you. Connecting with them respectfully creates an inner atmosphere of harmony and self-acceptance.

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Step 1: Access the Protector

Choose a protector you'd like to get to know better. Perhaps one that's causing difficulties in your life. If you're not sure, pick a challenging situation and notice what part gets activated.

1. Close your eyes, take some deep breaths, and focus inward.

2. See if you can sense the protector in your body. Maybe as constriction, tension, temperature, or energy.

3. Notice any images, words, or emotions that arise. How does this part appear to your inner sight?

4. Let it know you're interested in its experience.